Funny Words

April 10, 2009

I was thinking about funny words today.

Pants. David Letterman made the funniness of Pants famous when he formed his production company Wordwide Pants. We carry many precious things in our pants, starting with our sex and bathroom equipment and ending with whatever sticky thing you left in your pocket. Try adding "in your pants" at the end of fortune cookies. That'll make you crack a smile - in your pants.

Lick. When she was three, our young niece said, "Can I see that toy? I want to lick it." Maybe Hasbro plastic has a flavor I'm not fully aware of. Compared to more aggressive alternatives, "Lick Me" almost has a sweetness to it. You can drop it into regular speech, as in, "My brother just got some new toy, A Nintendo DS 2.5 Lick Me Whatever." I can't keep up with technology.

The word knob is even funnier without the prefix door. "So I'm looking through the dollar bin, and some knob left a bag of popcorn next to the clearance shamrock lick me I'm irish keychains" Knob used to mean hill, so on a map you sometimes see places like Floyd's Knob or Knob Spanker Meadow. When someone pulls a dumb-ass move with their car I usually feel better if I yell something like, "Nice move lickknob. Zip up and drive!"

I mentioned some of the funny words to Melissa, and she found another combination.

"Oh yeah? Lick my Pants! LICK MY PANTS!"

That's all for now. I hope all of you have a happy spring, in your pants.