Recipes are back! The Spicy Pork & Bean Delight kind of scared me away for a while, but I have finally recovered from that. It's a new year and single guys still need to eat, so let's do it.

I got a crock pot for Christmas. Next to the microwave, I think this is one of the best kitchen friends for the single guy. You throw all kinds of crap in it, turn it on, come back in a few hours and you've got real home-cooked food. It's great for weekend cooking when you can start it around noon and let it go all day long. Don't come home after work and try to cook a crock pot dinner, unless you like eating supper around one in the morning.

My first dish was a beef roast, so that's what we've got here. Here's your grocery list:

• Carrots
• Onions
• Potatoes
• Beef! Meat for roasting is usually much thicker than meat cut for steaks - get a 2-3 pound roast
• Can of Campbell's French Onion soup or beef broth

Your supplies:

• A crock pot
• Knife

The thing to remember with a crock pot is that because vegetables usually cook slower than meat you need to put them on the bottom so they get the most heat. When you do this it all comes out more or less even.

The procedure is so ridiculously easy that there's hardly anything to the recipe beyond turning the thing on.

Cut up your vegetables in to hearty man-sized chunks and dump them into the bottom of the pot. Drop your hunk of cold, bloody cow meat on top then empty the can of soup over the whole mess. Put the lid on, plug it in and you're done.

The only other thing you need to know is how hot and how long. Crock pots usually have two settings, low and high. You can use either, but low takes about twice as long as high. For a roast like this, cook on high for five to six hours.

You may wonder at first if it's actually cooking. It takes a while to get started. In ten minutes you should see condensation on the inside of the lid.

Once you're done cooking it. Take the meat out and put it on a big plate then scoop out the vegetables. It helps if you have a big spoon with holes in it. You'll know you did it right if the meat wants to fall apart as you're taking it out. The soup should mix with the juices from the meat and vegetables to make a nice broth. Put some of this over the serving plate, but don't drench it.

Use this plate as the mother load to which you return for seconds and left overs. Some folks can eat a three pound roast in one sitting, but it takes me at least two.

Serve your meat, vegetables, and broth in a big bowl with fork, spoon, sharp knife and a side of peanut butter sandwiches.

Suggested beverage: beer

Chow.